I still see my baby boy under the mature bone structure and shaved beard.
Watching him age isn't always a joy for me.
Especially when it comes to hormones and a bit of rebellion.
They both are connected to a girl, whom I am NOT fond of.
Riv knows exactly how I feel, and I think he enjoys seeing me shake and sputter over the issue.
I bite my tongue the best I can to not spew my negative opinion,
while still trying to let him know I will pull reign very tight if I have to for his best interest.
On the other side of it, the intellectual conversations we are able to have are amazing!
Of course, they are mostly one sided intellect, since Riv is much smarter than Randy or I [combined] will EVER be!
He is responsible, respectable, patient, empathetic, gentle, happy, and as I am finding out, a standard unpredictable teenager.
Jax's sense of humor is always goofy and has me bent over in stitches!
His tenderness, and compassion are genuine and so deep it can be painful for Jax.
We have had many recent moments with my 12 year old boy, curling up in my lap for me to rock him back to sanity.
His state of mind and emotions are on a continual roller coaster that leaves us all woozy and scared.
Jax's future is the most unpredictable subject in our lives right now.
Unpredictable has become my cling on.
And for once, I am giving up my control [lack of] and taking it
day by day, laugh by laugh, tear by tear......
and trying to keep cheerful during this mind-fuck of ring around the rosy.
3 comments:
Love those boys....so much!
Wish I had some great words of wisdom, but the only thing that comes to mind is to hang in there with these boys and keep on doing what youre doing. T ake time for yourself and Randy. Meditate
exercise, pray, whatever it takes. Know that you are loved and appreciated. m-i-l
Ditto what Carol said.
E
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